DIVORCE – IS IT REALLY OVER?

If only it was that simple – get over the shock and grief of losing a loved one, wade through legal and financial nightmares, have a "Mommy and Daddy don’t love each other any more but we love you" talk to children, dispute over custody of the children, move the house …

The ‘To Do’ list is overwhelmingly long even for an organised, clearheaded and emotionally balanced person. But how can you be all those things after being hit by a proverbial truck?

The list of emotional issues that is generated by divorce/separation just about equals the ‘To Do’ list.

It is common for a divorcee to experience bouts of depression, insomnia, anxiety and panic attacks, and difficulties to coping with smallest hitches of everyday life. Only lawyers benefit from your anger and resentment, your need to lash out at the person that betrayed your trust. Some get counselling, some take a pill, others look for an answer in a bottle. And some of those fixes may even work for some time.

But it doesn’t matter of how hard you try to suppress those issues, rest assured, they will pop their ugly head up - if not immediately then many years down the track, (34 years is nothing to a suppressed fear).

You may not even connect the problems you been having with THAT time in your life, or it could be as immediate as angry reaction to the sound of your Ex's voice when the only thing you had in mind was to discuss something so routine as school fees or what time to pick up the kids.

Triggers are such powerful things! Voices, songs, favoured restaurants, places or people. Slightly familiar features of total stranger could trigger a whopper of a panic attack if you had a violent relationship in the past.

It is so hard to act on such helpful advice as ‘Just get over it, put it behind you’. Those triggers are part of you, deeply sited in your subconscious mind and to get them out may seem like moving a mountain, if you try it on your own.

Hypnotherapy is a perfect tool to help you to move on with your life by directly working on your subconscious. Cut the emotional hooks that your ex still has in you, find out who you are, your strengths and your goals.

Stop suffering and be maker of your own happiness and destiny!

Written by: Olga Kot

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olgakot@optusnet.com.au

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